Our beautiful little man started taking steps a couple of days before his 1st Birthday and hasn't stopped since. It's weird seeing him upright and walking around. Kai is so much like his Daddy in looks and in behaviour.....I think life is never going to be dull with Kai around. He is loud, determined and has a wicked sense of humour!
Kai's first birthday was a huge affair. We had more than 60 of our closet friends and many were people that we have met through SCI. It was a great day and a little emotional.
I'm so glad we picked SCI as we have made so many life long friends. Friends who's children have the same story, friends who know the hardship involved in infertility and friends who love and respect India and our extended family from SCI.
I feel so sad that SCI was in the middle of such criticism lately and I would like to say to anyone that IVF is IVF, sometimes you succeed sometime's you don't. We had several tries and a miscarriage but if you keep trying it will happen. Kai's surrogate was never hospitalised not even once. I know many people said there surrogate was but isn't that better that she has that great care?
My advice for anyone who is thinking about surrogacy is that they have to respect the country, customs's and differences. You also have to TRUST and let go of some CONTROL. I found this hard at times especially after our miscarriage but your journey is much easier if you trust your clinic. I consider myself a pretty good judge of character and I just knew when I met Dr Shivani that she was honest and tried her best to make everyone's dream possible. I've seen how upset she get's when there is a negative or miscarriage.
If you want your experience to be the same as in a western country then you should go to the USA. I have to say though, regardless of the cost I would still pick INDIA over any other country. India because I have my name on the birth certificate, India because the surrogate mother cannot change her mind. These were the reason we picked in India in the end and the most unexpected reason I would suggest India now is because it has changed me. It has changed my older son and husband. Although we had travelled quite extensively we were not expecting to fall in love with the people and to be so taken with the spiritual beauty of India. It's so hard to put into words how I feel about India, it's like all the superficial parts of life are stripped away and the real and rawness of being human remains........
Best wishes to everyone on this journey and never give up or second guess yourself and your decisions. Respect people's choices no matter what country or clinic they choose and be kind to each other xx
Not a very safe hiding place........locks have since been installed on EVERYTHING!
Kai's first birthday was a huge affair. We had more than 60 of our closet friends and many were people that we have met through SCI. It was a great day and a little emotional.
I'm so glad we picked SCI as we have made so many life long friends. Friends who's children have the same story, friends who know the hardship involved in infertility and friends who love and respect India and our extended family from SCI.
I feel so sad that SCI was in the middle of such criticism lately and I would like to say to anyone that IVF is IVF, sometimes you succeed sometime's you don't. We had several tries and a miscarriage but if you keep trying it will happen. Kai's surrogate was never hospitalised not even once. I know many people said there surrogate was but isn't that better that she has that great care?
My advice for anyone who is thinking about surrogacy is that they have to respect the country, customs's and differences. You also have to TRUST and let go of some CONTROL. I found this hard at times especially after our miscarriage but your journey is much easier if you trust your clinic. I consider myself a pretty good judge of character and I just knew when I met Dr Shivani that she was honest and tried her best to make everyone's dream possible. I've seen how upset she get's when there is a negative or miscarriage.
If you want your experience to be the same as in a western country then you should go to the USA. I have to say though, regardless of the cost I would still pick INDIA over any other country. India because I have my name on the birth certificate, India because the surrogate mother cannot change her mind. These were the reason we picked in India in the end and the most unexpected reason I would suggest India now is because it has changed me. It has changed my older son and husband. Although we had travelled quite extensively we were not expecting to fall in love with the people and to be so taken with the spiritual beauty of India. It's so hard to put into words how I feel about India, it's like all the superficial parts of life are stripped away and the real and rawness of being human remains........
Best wishes to everyone on this journey and never give up or second guess yourself and your decisions. Respect people's choices no matter what country or clinic they choose and be kind to each other xx
I haven't been keeping up with things in the surrogacy world recently, so I haven't heard any criticism of SCI or Dr. Shivani. But I wanted to point out to your readers, that it is possible to have a surrogate in the USA and get your name on the birth certificate. And also, if you're using a gestational carrier, she can't legally choose to keep the baby. We delivered in Arkansas and our amended birth certificate arrived about a month later in the mail. (We got a judge to give us a pre-birth order before the birth. The initial birth certificate had our surro's name on it from the hospital but that's just for "counting" purposes. It's then sent to Little Rock for a name change. The cost for that was about $20.) And all in all the cost we spent wasn't very much for our whole surrogacy journey, egg donor, and IVF. I know you can get your name on the birth certificate in CA too. It's just that every state has different laws so you have to do a little research. But then, you have to research everything in the world of surrogacy.
ReplyDeleteAnyways...it's up to everyone where they go and the path they choose. I'm not here to judge anyone, but wanted to point out that it's not always that crazy hard or expensive here as you might think.
Thank you Leah. That's great for people to know. I guess because in India your name is automatically on the birth cert and you can exit within 3-4 weeks it is so much easier for Aussie's. Totally agree it's a individual's decision. So glad you had a great experience.
DeleteAlso, happy birthday to Kai. He looks like such a happy, healthy baby boy. You're a lucky mom!
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful, honest and heartfelt post. Thank you, for putting my very similar thoughts on India, it's culture and our choices of clinics into such beautiful words. We are truly blessed.
ReplyDeleteyour post was really honest and gives other IP's hope. It is natural to hae doubts but I agree with you that you hae to trust. We had the same feeling when we went to Dr Shivani and although the journey has not been as expected, the treatment we have received has always been respectful and Dr Shivani has taken time to talk to us when we have been upset and I believe she has also felt bad about losses and really wants positive outcomes for all patients. we feel in loe with India too it was a strange experience because first few days i was overwhelmed but now i can not wait to return
ReplyDeleteYour post is lovely, what a lovely baby boy you have, SCI is helping make our dreams come true and we are due to return next year and I can't wait. We also were plesently surprised at the beautiful spirit in India and how helpful and friendly everyone is.
ReplyDeleteWOW its been so long, how time flys Isabella just started walking and always has to be in my arms lol. You little one looks so damm cute
ReplyDeleteKai is such a gorgeous little man and looove the photo of him in the fridge! Kai has a lovely Mum and a gorgeous family so of course he is going to grow up well. Thank you for summing up what most of us feel about our experience with SCI and indeed India. I too feel very blessed to have met you Bec and to call you a friend. See you soon xxx
ReplyDeleteI loved your 2nd last paragraph (and the others) because it reflects exactly how I feel. I love the Country and it has without doubt changed me too.
ReplyDelete